I'm alive....

This will be brief, not much say.....

Had our big appointment this morning, and it turns out, we are not having twins.

Actually it turns out I'm not pregnant at all. Turns out I just couldn't put down the ho-ho's and doritos and it took a bit of a toll on my mid section. I'm just fat.

PSYCHE!! Totally joking. Sorry that was mean.

The morning started VERY early for me. My appointment wasn't until 8:30 but for some reason my anxiety decided to wake me up bright and early at 6. NO ONE in their right mind should be up that early. I guess I'm not really in my right mind though, am I?:)

I was having CONSTANT panic attacks all day yesterday and this morning, and just came to the decision that I COULD NOT go through with the actual exam part of the appointment until I talked to the Doctor about upping my dose on my medicine. I COULD NOT attempt this on top of all the anxiety I had been dealing with the past few days, and come out mentally ok. So, feeling slightly dissappointed in myself, as the nurse asked me to dress down and cover with those sheets that I SWEAR they wash with steel wool, I politely asked/told her that I just wouldn't be able to do the exam today. She sweetly smiled and told me that was just fine.

A short time later, my awesome doctor breezed in and smiled and said 'you don't think I expected to do an exam today, did you??' hahaha oh how I love that woman. She proceeded to tell me that she didn't want me to worry that she was going to harrass me at every appointment about getting it done, and that if we didn't end up doing one at all this pregnancy, then that would be ok. Would it have been weird if I had kissed her right then and there? Yes? Ok, well I didn't. I really wanted to though...

We carried on with all the other appointment crud: questions, questions, blood pressure check, more questions. And.Then.The.Time.Came.

It was time to see that precious little being(s) that I've been 'lovingly' growing for sometime now.

We piled into the ultrasound room and as soon as the wand was placed on my belly, I couldn't stop myself 'IS THERE MORE THAN ONE?!' I blurted out. Well, she proceeded to look around, and to quickly put Johns mind at ease, she said, 'nope, just one!'. PRAISE THE LORD. I'm pretty sure John blacked out for that quick second, but he seems to be fine now.

Best part of it? Remember how big I said I am getting already? I'M ONLY 8 WEEKS ALONG. What the crap. Fan-friggin-tastic. C'mon.

Anyway, turns out we have the CUTEST child ever grown by a human growing in my belly at this very moment. With a heart rate of about 171 bpm and the body length of a kidney bean (about 2cm), we grow 'em pretty cute around these here parts. 171 bpm! No wonder I'm so darn tired all the time! whew! Looks like our due date is: September 27th. HOORAY for a LONG, HOT summer! Blech....

Thank you for all thinking of me and praying for me today. These last few days I have had the most random people come out of the wood work to let me know they are praying for me and thinking about me. God is truly at work in my life, and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by so many wonderful people. Thank you thank you thank you. :)

Oh, and I guess you are all interested in how Liv took the news, huh? :) Before we left this morning, we sat down and told Livie why we were going to the doctor. She was a little more interested in her cheerios. But, once we told her that she would get to see it on the tv at the doctors office, she perked right up about it and seemed pretty excited. I think it looked a little different on the screen than she expected. At one point during the appointment she layed back on the table where she was sitting with me, lifted her shirt, sighed loudly, and informed us that she too had a baby in her tummy. Black out #2 for daddy.
As we were leaving the doctors office, Liv let me know that she was ready for the baby to come out of mommys tummy now so that she could rock-rock it.

You and me both, kid, you and me both.