So here I was reading my new Parenting magazine yesterday when I came across the most terrifying note that a mom had written in to the magazine regarding a past article. In fact, this little paragraph upset me so much, I'm still contemplating whether or not I want to continue on with my subscription if this is something that this magazine supports/encourages. Thats big for me. I'm pretty good about looking past things that I may not agree with to be able to enjoy the things that I do agree with. Not this. I.WAS.HORRIFIED.
Here's the letter-
"It's nice to see healthy and progressive ideas about sexuality in your magazine ["Touchy Subject," Ages + Stages]. Instead of making kids feel ashamed for exploring their bodies, parents should encourage it. Society teaches us from an early age that our bodies are more "sacred" than what they really are: functional and enjoyable!" -N.G., New York
WHA??? I just about nearly had a panic attack reading that again. Of COURSE our bodies are sacred things!! Thats how our awesome God intended them to be! He also did intend for us to 'enjoy' them, but in a way that is honoring ourselves and our creator.
Now, in no way would I ever condone making your child feel 'ashamed' for any reason. There are more efficient ways to get a point across to your little one. I DO have to disagree with the fact that society pushes the idea of 'sacredness' of our bodies on people though. I think it's quite opposite actually, I think society has completely demoralized the beautiful act that God created sex to be. That makes me sad.
It's mothers like this that make me worried for what the future will hold. What are we teaching our precious children in preparation for the world and the issues and sins that they will without a doubt face??
I'm getting off my soap box now. This is starting to sound like a bunch of babble and thats the last thing I want.
I really think this all goes along with that Moms for Modesty thing. I think we need to teach our kids how important it is to present our bodies and care for our bodies in a way that is honoring God.
Enough said.
Monday, January 7, 2008
I must have missed the memo....
Posted by Abbie at 10:03 AM
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4 comments:
Yikes. Ok, I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. Maybe the lady was referring to the premise of it's NOT ok to touch yourself, like, even as a teenager. Or, instead of gently telling your child to take their hand out of their pants (been there), there are parents out there being all nasty and slapping their kids on the wrist with a ruler because they were caught doing it. Maybe she was advocating the idea to teach our children it's not embarrassing or shameful, but it's also certainly not something that should be done in front of someone or in public, etc. Or, maybe, she's sitting in her house with a tie-die "Make love not war" shirt on and smoking a doobie, who knows.Then I wouldn't really defend the person.
Do you hate me?
Abbie,
I agree with your concern. While Jenny may be totally on the money (I tend to be a benefit of the doubt kind of gal too), I do think that "encouraging" children to explore their bodies could lead parents and children into discussions neither is ready to have. There is, in my humble little opinion, a certain age in which we as parents should initiate the "talk" and by dicussing our bodies as "functional and enjoyable," at too early an age, I'm concerned that children will be given more information than is necessary, possibly causing confusion, guilt, and a warped sense of self that can stick with a little one's psyche for years to come. Not worth it.
I'm in the why-encourage-them camp. That is one of the last things kids need to worry about simply because the ramifications are just too long term and too great.
When interest in their bodies arrise, I tend to answer children matter-of-factly and move on. I stay open for discussions but emphasize with them that a certain age and maturity are necessary for more in-depth discussions. I always mention that God made our bodies special and unique and they are to be cared for in such a way as to honor Him.
Stick to your guns Abbie. Maybe don't cancel your subscription, but write Parents and tell them what you wrote here. Miss New York gave her opinion, maybe they need to hear yours too!
Oh wow, I must have totally missed that in my mag! I would write them a letter. In fact, I may when I read that. Why do kids seem to have to grow up so fast nowadays?
I agree with you on this - I don't think the problem is that young people aren't comfortable with their bodies - I think the problem is with young people are being too casual with them and not respecting how special they are.
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